Why Marketing Feels Gross (And How to Fix It)

For coaches, healers, and heart-led entrepreneurs who feel resistance around marketing

Do you feel that pit in your stomach every time you think about marketing your coaching business?

Does posting about what you do feel pushy, salesy, or just… gross?

You’re not broken.

And you’re not doing it wrong.

I’ve worked with hundreds of coaches, therapists, and heart-led entrepreneurs who feel exactly this way. And today, I want to completely reframe what marketing actually is so you can stop hiding and start helping the people who genuinely need you. (Curious about what I do? Check out this page.)

But I also want to be honest with you.

Even after this reframe clicks, some of you still won’t be able to do it consistently.

That’s the real issue. And that’s what we need to talk about.

Why Marketing Triggers So Much Resistance for Coaches

You didn’t get into this work to sell people things.

You got into it because you actually care.

You want to help.

You want to make a difference.

And yes, you’d like to make a good living doing it, without scraping the bottom of the barrel.

Then someone says, “Great! Now you need to market yourself.”

And immediately… the ick.

You picture pushy mall kiosk salespeople who won’t leave you alone.

Those cringey Instagram DMs trying to recruit you into an MLM.

Ads screaming BUY NOW with seventeen exclamation points.

So you think, I don’t want to be that person.

And you stop.

You wait.

You hide.

You hope word of mouth will magically be enough.

You post occasionally… and then feel confused or secretly relieved when no one responds, because at least you weren’t “too much.”

Meanwhile:

• Your calendar stays empty

• Your income feels shaky

• And the people who need you can’t find you

The Fundamental Misunderstanding About Marketing

Here’s the real problem.

You’re not resisting marketing because you’re lazy, unmotivated, or afraid of success.

You’re resisting it because you’ve misunderstood what marketing actually is.

Marketing isn’t taking.

Marketing isn’t pushing.

Marketing is offering.

The Parking Spot Analogy (Why This Changes Everything)

Imagine you’re circling a parking lot or a parking garage and you can’t find a spot. You’re frustrated. You’re late. You’re about to give up and go home.

Then someone leans out their window and says,

“Hey — there’s a spot right over here.”

Did that feel pushy?

Salesy?

Manipulative?

Of course not.

They simply offered information.

You were free to take it or leave it.

That’s marketing.

Marketing is saying:

“I see this problem. I have a solution. If this helps you, I’m here.”

You’re not forcing anyone.

You’re not manipulating anyone.

You’re making yourself available.

Why Not Marketing Is Actually Gatekeeping

Here’s where this gets uncomfortable and important.

If you have a solution to someone’s problem and they don’t know you exist, you’re not being humble.

You’re withholding help.

Somewhere right now, someone is awake at 2 a.m. Googling the exact problem you solve. They’re exhausted. They’re stuck. They’re asking friends for recommendations.

And you have the answer.

But they can’t find you because you’re hiding.

So they either work with someone less qualified…

or they give up entirely.

That’s not kindness.

That’s gatekeeping.

Why You Don’t Need to Explain Everything You Do

This is where many coaches go wrong, and I’ve been here, too.

They think marketing means explaining:

• every process

• every credential

• every framework

• every detail

It doesn’t.

Marketing is not shoving the whole cake down someone’s throat.

Marketing is offering a slice.

The Slice of Cake Approach to Marketing

Think about a bakery.

They don’t bring out the entire wedding cake and explain every layer to everyone who walks by.

They put a beautiful slice in the window.

That slice does its job.

Your marketing works the same way.

You’re not convincing everyone.

You’re not explaining everything in one post.

You’re offering a glimpse of the transformation.

“I help burned-out entrepreneurs get their energy back without burning their business down.”

“I help coaches get unstuck when they know what to do but can’t make themselves do it.”

“I help people raise their rates without spiraling into guilt or panic.”

That’s the slice.

That’s the parking spot.

The right people lean in.

Everyone else scrolls past.

What This Looks Like in Real Life

Someone asks, “How was your day?”

You say, “It was great. I just helped a client raise her rates from $3k to $5k — and she sold three spots.”

You didn’t pitch.

You didn’t break confidentiality.

You just told the truth.

If the person isn’t an entrepreneur, they nod and move on.

If they are — and they’re struggling — they ask,

“Wait… how did you do that?”

They opened the door.

You didn’t shove the cake at them.

You let them step inside.

And that’s all marketing is.

Your Job Is Not to Be Perfect — It’s to Be Findable

The people who need you don’t care if your content is polished.

They don’t care if your hair is flat on YouTube.

They don’t care if there are dog toys on the floor.

They just need to know you exist.

Your job is not to be perfect.

Your job is to be findable.

A New Definition of Marketing

Let’s make this simple.

Marketing is love made visible.

Marketing is saying:

“I see your pain. I have something that can help. I’m available.”

That’s generosity.

That’s service.

That’s integrity.

The gross marketing you’re thinking of is manipulation.

Honest marketing is just telling the truth.

The Missing Piece: Why Understanding Isn’t Enough

Here’s what I see all the time.

You understand this reframe.

You agree with it.

And the moment you think about posting, your body shuts down.

That’s not a mindset issue.

That’s not a motivation issue.

That’s a block.

Some people freeze.

Some spiral into perfectionism.

Some avoid visibility because deep down they feel like a burden.

Once those blocks are addressed, execution becomes easy.

Your Homework: The Parking Spot Statement

Write one simple, factual sentence about what you do.

No fluff.

No selling.

“I help entrepreneurs who feel stuck get unstuck so they can move forward.”

That’s it.

Now notice what happens in your body when you imagine sharing it.

If there’s tension, heaviness, or resistance — that’s information.

Ready to Move From Understanding to Action?

Understanding is step one.

Implementation is where things actually change.

If marketing makes sense in your head but your body still resists it, I recommend you check out the Market Mindset Reframe Worksheet. This worksheet will help you to look at your marketing differently and with a new eye, which might be all you need to move into marketing your business boldly.

If you do the worksheet and are still hesitating to market, I invite you to my free two-part training:

From Stuck to Clients: The Missing Piece

Part 1: What actually works right now in marketing — and how to choose the right strategy for you

Part 2: Why execution breaks down — and how to clear the block

You deserve a visible, profitable business without the ick.

And someone out there needs to know you exist.